i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
