Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
