I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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