we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
