Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
