so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
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