i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
