hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
