I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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