on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
