Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
