ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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