another moral hangover. fuck.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize