ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
