Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Randomize