Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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