It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
