So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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