I want to stick my p in your. b.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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