is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
