he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
