Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
