I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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