doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Randomize
