Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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