people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
