She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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