I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize