okay pat passed out under dana's car
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize