I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
