I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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