Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
