Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
