Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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