so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
