Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
It was a blind-side dick pic.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
i black out too much to be "responsible"
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