rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
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