I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
