We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
