I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize