I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
