Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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