my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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