is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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