I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
We need to get me chipped asap
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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