Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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