I think my vagina is haunted
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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