im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
