Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize