We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
