you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize